"One more thing: I don't waste my time trying to stay clean because it's ossur. Rachel and Leyah gave all the reasons for leaving their jerky-father's house before they added, "and that's what Hashem wants you to do, so let's go!".
So, why are you really here? Is it because something just woke up in you to suddenly start keeping halacha? Or was there something more that drove you to take the step of joining GYE? I am assuming you started to accept what your lust problem does to your life?
"What does it do to your life?